Saturday, January 23, 2010

Day 23 ~ A Reminder

Yesterday was a bad day. A real crappy day.

I got a call from my husband yesterday while I was grocery shopping. He found out they are doing major layoffs at the site he works at and the contract workers were the first to go. Needless to say, his last day will be this coming Friday. Although it was a contract job, this was unexpected, but as you know with corporate business, it is nothing personal. It is always a numbers game. So we are right back where we were 10 months ago and I woke up mad. Not mad at anyone, just mad at the circumstances. Mad at life. I spent all of yesterday in shock and most of this morning mad. I don’t worry about me, my wants, my needs, it is my children who I worry about. It is that fear of how will we provide? Yes, I know it will all work out fine, but the job market really stinks, there is not much out there and it is scary. I am so thankful for the fact my husband has a second job because although it won’t pay all the bills it is still an income and we are very fortunate for that. I spent most of my morning whining and bitching and moaning until I heard this little voice saying "LORD ALMIGHTY, SSSHHHUUUTTT UP!!!!!” Yes, it was me talking to myself. “Jennifer, pull it together and stop your bitching! This is so pathetic! You are so blessed!” I swear it was strange, just like a movie. I decided that minute I would stop the negative and focus on the positive because I am blessed. Everything is so relative. You look at the aftermath of the earth quake in Haiti and the tragedy involved and how so many people don’t even have their basic needs and I am complaining? So many have lost their family and friends and I am bitching? It made me really take a second look at my situation and realize how lucky I really am because I am VERY BLESSED.

Later in the day I got a call from a very close friend who had gone through the same financial struggle we are facing once again. She wanted to meet us for a little shopping and dinner. I was still feeling a little down and at first said no. The truth is I can’t afford it. Well, she was not taking no for an answer and finally convinced me to meet her with the kids. I figured there is no harm in looking, plus some good company would be a good distraction. Remember, I am done whining. Well, I had no idea what she had in store for me. Not only did she take myself and the kids to my very favorite restaurant (Zao Noodles) her treat, but proceeded to purchase each one of my girls something special. I said no, but once again, she wasn’t taking no for an answer. As for why she did this, she did it to make me smile. She did this because she knew I would say no at first, but that ultimately she would win, and ultimately it would make me laugh and the kids would love it. She did this for me because she wanted to let me know that no matter how bad things got, that she was there. What she did was remind me of the fact that it isn’t the things you have, the home you own, or the cars you drive that make you happy, it is the people in your life that count. So I sit here tonight and smile, and really feel like everything will be alright because I am truly blessed.

My new thing for the day was a wonderful surprise from a dear friend and the reminder of how truly blessed I am!